January,
2003
Coaching
Mastery News is a monthly newsletter for professionals committed
to excellence in coaching.
Each issue focuses on a theme that emerges in coaching relationships. What questions or issues would you like
to see addressed in Coaching Mastery News? Email your suggestions
to Lisa@livingwithintention.com. Your feedback and questions are greatly
appreciated. If
you wish to share this newsletter with your network, please pass
it along! If you would like to unsubscribe, simply
send me an email with unsubscribe CMN in the subject line.
-- Lisa Kramer
Self-Management
in the Coaching Relationship
Part
I
In
a recent Coaching Mastery group, a coach described a situation with
her client, who we will call 'Bob'.
Bob resigned from a full-time job in the summer of 2002 to
become a self-employed marketing consultant.
He hired a coach in the late fall because he wanted more
structure and accountability in building his consulting business.
By December, Bob was feeling extreme self-doubt, wondering
what value he could possibly offer to prospective clients. He felt like a failure. The coach was struggling with how to help
Bob view his situation from a different perspective. After all, it was clear to her that he
had the intelligence, professional experience, and skills to provide
his clients with tremendous value.
The challenge she faced was how to help Bob recognize his
greatness. How could she help him believe in himself?
In discussing the situation with the group, the coach realized
that she was coaching Bob's Gremlin, his inner voice that was telling
him he couldn't do it. Bob was convinced he had made a terrible
mistake by leaving his full-time job, and the coach was starting
to believe him.
How can coaches assist their clients to 'self-manage' when the Gremlin shows up?
v First,
it is important to educate the client at the beginning of the coaching
relationship about the Gremlin.
You might even suggest that the client read Richard Carson's
book Taming Your Gremlin.
Explain that the Gremlin resides in all of us, and that as
individuals move toward achieving their goals, the Gremlin emerges
to preserve the status quo.
v Second,
help the client to learn to become more aware by noticing when the
Gremlin is present. For
'Bob', his Gremlin got triggered whenever he heard about a competitor's
accomplishments. He would then begin to compare himself
to his competitor and feel discouraged.
v Third,
don't try to coach the client's Gremlin.
You and the client can playfully notice when the Gremlin
is present during the coaching session and instruct it to leave
the room. Or you can side-step the Gremlin by asking
the client to reflect back on a previous success related to the
current issue. You
might also invite the client to tap into the Wise self, that inner
voice that possesses great wisdom and has the client's best interest
at heart. What does the Wise self want to say to
the client?
v Fourth,
encourage your client to keep an evidence journal, a running record
of successes, accomplishments, and energizing experiences that help
the client feel optimistic.
When the Gremlin shows up, request that your client refer
to the journal as a way of quieting the inner critic.
v Finally,
get comfortable with your own Gremlin.
When you find yourself in a place of struggle, apply some
of the above suggestions to your situation.
As coaches are better able to 'self-manage' their own Gremlins,
we can be even more effective in assisting our clients to do the
same!
*Whitworth,
Laura, Henry Kimsey-House and Phil Sandahl. Co-Active
Coaching, Palo
Alto:
Davies-Black, 1998
*Carson,
Richard. Taming
Your Gremlin: A Guide to Enjoying Yourself,
The
next issue of Coaching Mastery News will address Self-Management
in the Coaching Relationship Part II:
Self-Management
for the Coach
What
issues or questions would you like addressed regarding Self-Management
for the Coach?
Email me at Lisa@livingwithintention.com
COACHING
MASTERY GROUP UPDATE
Coaching
Mastery telegroups, facilitated by Lisa Kramer,
an experienced coach and veteran coach training teleclass leader, provides coaches with a safe learning
environment to further develop their coaching excellence.
Participants
get great value from gathering with other coaches to discuss important
themes and challenges that emerge in their coaching relationships. Here's what one participant had to say
about her recent group experience:
"I
joined Coaching Mastery as an experiment, as I was not convinced
that there would be substantial value in it for me. Well, I knew
after one session that there was huge value! And in only three sessions
with my Coaching Mastery group, I have increased my "coaching confidence"
10-fold, and my clients have noticed the difference! The group,
guided by Lisa Kramer's masterful facilitation and spot-on questioning,
is a forum in which I can develop and test my coaching approaches,
flex my strengths, strategize with other coaches, and have my blind
spots gently revealed to me through the coaching of my colleagues.
I've made a huge leap into a being a more daring, creative, relaxed
and genuine coach and because of that, my clients have made leaps
too." Colleen Bracken, MCB & Associates
www.mcbcoaching.com
Coaching
Mastery Level I and Level II telegroups
for February, 2003:
Level
I: This group is best
suited for professionals who have been coaching for a year or less. The group provides structure and support
to assist you in gaining confidence and clarity in your coaching
relationships.
The
Level I group will meet on Wednesday February 5, 12, 19 and 26 from
Curious
about Coaching Mastery?
Interested in a complimentary individual Coaching Mastery session? Contact Lisa Kramer at (610) 527-4511
or lisa@livingwithintention.com
Richard
Carson will be offering a Taming Your Gremlin® workshop on Saturday,
May 17 and Sunday, May 18 in Warrington, Bucks County, Pennsylvania. To register or for more information, call
(800) 253-9269 or visit the website at www.tamingyourgremlin.com
Are
you curious about Coaching Mastery? Interested in a complimentary
individual Coaching Mastery session?
Contact Lisa Kramer at (610) 527-4511 or lisa@livingwithintention.com
Upcoming
Events in the
Lisa
Kramer will be leading a panel discussion at the
Copyright
© 2002.
Permission is granted to reproduce, copy, or distribute the Coaching
Mastery? News as long as nothing is added, changed, or deleted,
and this copyright notice is attached. The author is Lisa Kramer,
Living with Intention Coaching, Training and Coaching Mastery? www.livingwithintention.com